Here is the tracklist:

1. Tune Out - The Format
2. Kill - Jimmy Eat World
3. Raise The Dead - Phantom Planet
4. The Geeks Were Right - The Faint
5. Freewheel - Duke Special
6. Poker Face - Lady Gaga
7. Come On Get Higher - Matt Nathanson
8. Great DJ - The Ting Tings
9. And Darling - Tegan and Sarah
10. Alright - Supergrass
11. Thinking of You - Umbrellas
12. Make This Go On Forever - Snow Patrol
13. Leaves In The River - Sea Wolf
14. Earthbound - Rodney Crowell
15. Moving Pictures Silent Films - Great Lake Swimmers
16. Say Hello Wave Goodbye - David Gray

You can view and download it here.

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1. Can You Tell - Ra Ra Riot
2. Flathead - The Fratellis
3. Black Shoes - The Films
4. Boats & Birds - Gregory & The Hawk
5. The River - Anathallo
6. Crown of Love - The Arcade Fire
7. Jesus Christ - Brand New
8. Some Are Lakes - Land Of Talk
9. Plenty Of Paper - Eisley
10. Fatalist Palmistry - Why?
11. Bookworm - Margot & the Nuclear So and So’s
12. Vote - The Submarines
13. Your Exit - Umbrellas
14. Sub Symphonika - The Submarines
15. Spine - Page France
16. A Time For Emily - The Elected
17. The Compromise - The Format

First, I usually don’t put two songs by the same Artist on a mixtape, but since The Submarines are awesome and November is the month for elections, I decided to go for it and see how it worked.

November has been a really weird month for me so far. I wish I could put it all into words and somehow explain it all but as I’ve said before, and as most of you know, words aren’t exactly my strong suit. My life is hectic and I don’t have enough time to think about what I should say. I remember when I didn’t have to sit for hours on end to think of what to say, or how to say something. I’ve lost that gift; more than likely, this is because I’ve kept bottled up. I’ve had to find new ways to express how I feel and music is probably the only way that I can really do that.

Lisa knows the extent to which I’ll go just to find the perfect song for what I’m feeling. November was weird because they all sort of just popped out of nowhere for me and this mixtape developed fairly quick.

Anyway, enjoy this and hopefully someday soon I’ll have enough time to explain what it is that I’m feeling as I make these mixtapes.

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I posted this on my Tumblr earlier today:

There are no words that can describe how I feel today. I woke up and even though I haven’t done anything different then any other day, I feel like a different person. Something inside me has changed forever; maybe it’s the fact that hope has found it’s way back into my soul, maybe it’s because my faith has been restored.

I’m not going to stop fighting now that we’ve overcome a huge hurdle. Prop 8 is too close to call, gay marriage bans passed in Arizona and Florida. A ban on gay couples adopting passed in Arkansas. The fight isn’t over, not by a long shot, but winning the fight seems more possible now.

Like everything worth fighting for, like every good change, in order to make true progress, we need to move one step at a time. Last night, we made the first out of many more to come. They will come; because we aren’t going to just settle for what happened, we’ll always want more, and we proved last night that as long as we are doing this together, anything is possible.

I can’t really explain what about last nights election changes me as a person. There are so many things, that, when you add them up, define the night for me. I have never been able to explain my feelings and emotions with any sort of clarity, which I think is why the music I listen to is deeply connected with how I’m feeling when I make my mixtapes. If you listen to my mixtapes, the lyrics, the sounds, it describes perfectly my life, right at that moment. However, it’s hard to make a mixtape centered only around one night and no matter how hard I try, I won’t be able to compile one quickly enough to really matter right now. It’s best for me to use other people’s words, people who are far more eloquent with words than I am. I’ll try to explain my thoughts along the way, but as always, I will never do justice to how I’m really feeling.

If there is anyone out there who still doubts that America is a place where all things are possible; who still wonders if the dream of our founders is alive in our time; who still questions the power of our democracy, tonight is your answer.

It’s the answer told by lines that stretched around schools and churches in numbers this nation has never seen; by people who waited three hours and four hours, many for the very first time in their lives, because they believed that this time must be different; that their voice could be that difference.

It’s the answer spoken by young and old, rich and poor, Democrat and Republican, black, white, Latino, Asian, Native American, gay, straight, disabled and not disabled – Americans who sent a message to the world that we have never been a collection of Red States and Blue States: we are, and always will be, the United States of America.

It’s the answer that led those who have been told for so long by so many to be cynical, and fearful, and doubtful of what we can achieve to put their hands on the arc of history and bend it once more toward the hope of a better day.

It’s been a long time coming, but tonight, because of what we did on this day, in this election, at this defining moment, change has come to America. - Barack Obama Nov. 4th, 2008

131 million people are said to have voted in the 2008 Presidential election; that means that voter turnout was 64.1%, more than in any other election since 1960. Apathy and indifference, clearly, had their asses kicked. Maybe this won’t continue in elections to come, maybe it will, but the fact that it happened in this election is amazing.

And so it came to pass that on Nov. 4, 2008, shortly after 11 p.m. Eastern time, the American Civil War ended, as a black man — Barack Hussein Obama — won enough electoral votes to become president of the United States….That is what happened Tuesday night and that is why we awake this morning to a different country. The struggle for equal rights is far from over, but we start afresh now from a whole new baseline. Let every child and every citizen and every new immigrant know that from this day forward everything really is possible in America. - Thomas L. Friedman

Race in no way contributed to my vote, however, I’ve struggled with my friends and family, fought with them, yelled at them. I’ve heard the “N” word used more times in the past month than I have in my entire life, and all were directed at Obama. This shouldn’t have been about race, and clearly, it wasn’t, but for some people it was. With the election decided, Obama the 44th President, we’ve reached a huge milestone in our history as a nation.

The doubt that filled me, that I’ve struggled with, tried to overcome…this is truly inspiring. I was selfish; I voted for myself. But as I look back at the reasons why I voted, I realize that yes, these are things that I want and that I believe, but ultimately, aren’t for me at all. My vote was for my little sisters, who now have every right to believe that with hard work, determination, and will power can accomplish anything that they want. My vote was for the kids that I wish I could have, want to have someday, so that they can be born into a country whose past, while jaded, is now overshadowed by it’s present and future. My vote was for my grandparents, even if my grandpa thinks I’m crazy and that I don’t know jack shit, because he’s worked hard all his life, because both my grandma and grandpa instilled in me the belief that my vote really does count and that what I have to say, be it ridiculous or not, matters. My vote was for my parents because I see them struggle every day to raise a family, because my dad doesn’t know if he’ll have a job tomorrow even though he’s spent 30 years of his life there.

I’m going to end it with a few more words, about Proposition 8 and the other ballot measures that have caused a huge stir. Even if Prop 8 hadn’t passed the fight wouldn’t have been over. Yes, it sucks deeply, it’s disgusting, but it’s one proposition. If it hadn’t passed, intolerance would still exist. Perseverance, that is what we need. Forget the small defeat and look to the future, at the bigger picture, and continue to fight. This is not the end. The people who supported Prop 8 haven’t won a damn thing. The people who feel defeat about Prop 8, pick yourselves up; there is reason to hope, there is reason to continue fighting. Anything is possible. I believe we just proved that last night.

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What did liberals do that was so offensive to the Republican Party? I’ll tell you what they did. Liberals got women the right to vote. Liberals got African-Americans the right to vote. Liberals created Social Security and lifted millions of elderly people out of poverty. Liberals ended segregation. Liberals passed the Civil Rights Act, the Voting Rights Act. Liberals created Medicare. Liberals passed the Clean Air Act, the Clean Water Act. What did Conservatives do? They opposed them on every one of those things, every one. So when you try to hurl that label at my feet, ‘Liberal,’ as if it were something to be ashamed of, something dirty, something to run away from, it won’t work, because I will pick up that label and I will wear it as a badge of honor. - The West Wing

Mandy once told me that I was a crazy liberal. She meant that in the nicest way possible, I’m sure. I don’t keep my opinions to myself; I’m loud, often obnoxious, and I don’t care if other people agree with me or not. These are my opinions, my beliefs, and no one has any right to tell me that what I feel, think, or believe is wrong. I, for the most part, believe that I shouldn’t tell other people that what they believe, politically or otherwise, is wrong either. I do, however, voice my opinions when I feel that someone else’s opinions are completely based in falsehood or are utterly insane.

I’ve said this before, I don’t care who you vote for. If you think McCain is the right choice, by all means, vote for him. What drives me up the wall is when people vote for McCain simply because he’s the white candidate, not because he’s the right candidate. Or you vote for McCain because you are one of the idiots who still think Obama is a Muslim, an Arab, or a terrorist sympathizer. Yes, I just called them idiots, and no, I won’t take it back or apologize.

@joshawesome I am too, I feel like it’s my birthday. I’m honestly excited, proud, and grateful for the opportunity to vote for Obama. - Mandy

There haven’t been many moments in the recent past where I’ve been proud, I mean really, to be an American. This election, however, has truly made me proud, hopeful, grateful, and ecstatic. I know we’ve come a long way since the Civil Rights Era, but I never thought that I would see a Black man as a serious Presidential candidate in my lifetime. I’ve never been filled with this magnitude of hope before.

I’m waking up at 6AM tomorrow to vote. I’m so excited that I cannot sleep; I’ve never been this excited for anything in my life. I’m voting for change, because I believe that we can change. I believe we need to change. In the end, change will come out the winner, the victor, and I’ll be drinking celebratory drinks instead of drinking to drown my sorrows.

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The other day, Crush Girl, sent me a link, saying I would find it interesting. I did, to say the least, find it interesting.

DNA analysis from 112 male-to-female transsexual volunteers showed they were more likely to have a longer version of the androgen receptor gene.

The genetic difference may cause weaker testosterone signals, the team reported in Biological Psychiatry.

Granted, this study was geared towards MTF’s (Male to Female) but this says a lot. Trans people are treated psychologically for a mental disorder to get the hormones and surgeries we need. People look at us and think that we’re crazy or that how we feel is a sin. People struggle with understanding our situations. I don’t think that this will solve everything, not even close, but this is a huge step in our struggle.

This isn’t validation, but it’s close. It’s almost a big, giant, fuck you to everyone who ever thought who I am was simply because I’m psychotic.

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Swear Words Used

I swear a lot. This is pretty toned down because I was keeping track but if you multiply these numbers by about 110%, you’ll get how much I normally swear in a week. Fuck is, by far, my favorite swear word. Followed by douchebag. I’ve heard it all before about how swearing makes someone sound unintelligent, but I don’t give a shit. It helps me relieve stress, it makes me focus, and it helps me get my work done. I also use it for emphasis.

Lunch

For the most part, I try to eat fairly healthy. It doesn’t help that I barely eat, so lunch is really the most important of my day. Sometimes I eat dinner, sometimes I don’t and usually my breakfast consists of coffee. Lunch is the only meal of my day that I actually can control what I eat. I make sure to always pack some fruit, some soy yogurt, and a sandwich. Usually my mom asks me what I want and it’s almost always the same thing. Once in awhile I’ll eat left-overs from dinner, but I’m not really a left over person. Unless the left-overs are lasagna…

Miles Driven

The curse of commuting to work in a very rural area is that you have to drive. Public transportation here is pretty horrible and virtually non-existent. Sometimes, my friend Bizzy and I carpool halfway, but this week I just couldn’t wake up early enough to get there on time. I was forced to drive the whole way all week, and the day that I did wake up early enough, I drove the whole way. Really, I don’t mind it, but after you’ve had a very stressful day, the last thing you want to do is drive. The fact that gas is now $2.59 where I work makes it less stressful as I’m not putting a huge chunk of my paycheck in my gas tank.

People I Talk To

I barely get to talk to my friends. The only exceptions would be Bizzy, Erikka, and Crush Girl. I work with Bizzy and Erikka so I get to talk to them a lot. Crush girl works the same time as I do, for the most part, so we IM constantly. Then after work I stalk her via text message. We’ve also called a few times this week. This won’t really change from week to week unless I’m feeling adventurous. I did leave a lot of people out but that’s because I only talk to them at work so eh.

Hours Worked

I work a lot. This is a light work week for me. So yay. This weeks total: 72 hours. That’s almost two normal work weeks put together. It’s a lot of fun. I should say that I do spend a great deal of this time working from home, so it’s not like I’m stuck in an office the whole time. That’s always a great thing; sitting on your ass, on your couch or bed, and getting paid to work. I usually wear my pajamas and my kick ass slipper-shoes. I call them slipper-shoes because I can wear them for both work and relaxing. They are versatile.

Music I’ve listened to

Top Artists

• Kaiser Chiefs
• Iron & Wine
• The Shins
• Paolo Nutini
• Kings of Convenience
• Death Cab for Cutie
• The Decemberists
• Elliot Smith
• The Films
• Keane
• Biffy Clyro
• Band of Horses
• The Hours
• Noah and the Whale
• Elbow

Top Tracks

• Kaiser Chiefs - Never Miss A Beat
• Fleet Foxes - Textbook Love
• Kings of Convenience - I’d Rather Dance With You
• Paolo Nutini - Jenny Don’t Be Hasty
• Iron & Wine - Love and Some Verses
• Biffy Clyro - Love Has A Diameter

You can see more about my music listening habits on my last.fm profile.

Movies I’ve Watched

• Nim’s Island (twice - not because it was good either (it’s not))
• Indiana Jones and The Kingdom Of the Crystal Skull
• Sex And The City
• House Party 2
• Pretty In Pink
• Rocky 2

When I have time to find my memory card reader I will upload the pics from this week. Really, there aren’t that many anyway because I didn’t have time to take any pics, or to remember to take pics, or to remember to charge the battery…

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The regular tracklist is as follows:

Tracklist

1. Jenny Don’t Be Hasty - Paolo Nutini
2. Love Has A Diameter - Biffy Clyro
3. One Week Of Danger - The Virgins
4. Wolves at Night - The Manchester Orchestra
5. I’d Rather Dance With You - Kings Of Convenience
6. Never Miss a Beat - Kaiser Chiefs
7. Textbook Love - Fleet Foxes
8. With A Bullet - Sam Roberts
9. Love and Some Verses - Iron & Wine
10. Dont Trust Me - 3OH!3
11. 10,000 Nights of Thunder - Alphabeat
12. Good Fight Fighting - The Very Most
13. Surefooted - Geoff Ereth
14. Happy Day Today - Jim Noir
15. Rocks And Daggers - Noah and the Whale
16. Rum Brave - Murder By Death
17. Skeleton Man - Evangelicals
18. For The Winter Coats - Oxford Collapse

I decided to make an extended version of the mixtape just for people who read the blog. Below is the tracklist along with links to listen/download the song. Enjoy and let me know what you think in the comments.

The Extended Tracklist

1. Shadow - The Southland
2. Upon Viewing Brueghel’s “Landscape With The Fall Of Icarus” - Titus Andronicus
3. Year of the Dog - The Lovely Sparrows
4. Ways To Make It Through The Wall - Los Campesinos!
5. Electric Feel (MGMT Cover) - Katy Perry
6. This Ship Was Built To Last - The Duke Spirit
7. Come On Get Higher - Matt Nathanson
8. Orange Sky - Alexi Murdoch
9. Diamonds In The Dark - Mystery Jets
10. Ghosts - Laura Marling
11. Generator - The Holloways
12. Your Fractured Life - Air traffic

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Sundays: I usually hang out around the house and find things to do. Sometimes I spend the day with my sisters and run around. The Wal-Mart in our town was just upgraded to a SuperCenter Wal-Mart and they have a section dedicated to playing Rockband for Xbox360. This is always fun and I kickass at it. Sundays are also my denial days. I’m in denial about the fact that the day after Sunday is always Monday and that means I have to go back to work.

Mondays: I drive an hour everyday to work. Sometimes I pick up Bizzy halfway, sometimes she picks me up halfway. I get to work and I load up on coffee. I work. I talk to crush girl. I work through my lunch most of the time so I don’t get behind. I drive home an hour, pick up my dad at work, go home, eat, and usually I fall asleep.

Tuesdays: See Monday.

Wednesdays: See Tuesday. I usually have a bunch of conference calls on Wednesdays. After work, usually I go to open mic night.

Thursdays: See Wednesday, minus the conference calls. Thursdays are a bit nicer because the day after Thursday is Friday.

Fridays: I work. Talk to crush girl. Go home. Depending on whether I get paid or not, I may go out to a bar with friends.

Saturdays: I do a lot of running around. I mean a lot.

So we’ll see how this goes. I bought a new digital camera awhile ago and I haven’t had enough time to even use it lately. So it’ll be nice to actually be able to use something that’s meant to be used. Maybe that way I won’t feel like I wasted a couple hundred bucks.

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When I met you, I thought I saw my future. Our future. Now, I’m not sure what I saw.

Dear Old Love,

March seems like such a long time ago and if I’m being honest with myself, I’m pretty sure I don’t remember most of it. I was heartbroken; more heartbroken than I had ever been before. I turned into one of those stupid saps that doesn’t do anything and tries to waste away; the kind of person who doesn’t handle a break up that well and other people look at them and think “get a life” or “jesus, that person is a fucker.”

I find it odd how I remember everything about how we first met, everything that happened when we first started dating, but I can remember nothing about breaking up. I vaguely remember pulling away from the house. After that, I remember nothing. From March to June I was a zombie and although I tried not to be, everything had shut off and went into lockdown. I woke up one day in June and things seemed different; it was the first day that I woke up and didn’t think of you.

I’ve made a lot of progress in my own life and while I was sad that you weren’t a part of that, I no longer had to share everything with you, I no longer needed to or wanted to. I would have been lying though if I had said that I no longer loved you or didn’t want to be with you. I’m still heartbroken about the breakup, I still love you, but my feelings about the breakup, and you, have changed. I met other girls, I dated, I didn’t date, I had (still do) a crush, and slowly you became just a memory and the thought of you no longer stung.

Part of me knew that you would still read my blog, try to keep tabs on what I was up to, but I never thought that you would get in touch with me. I’ll admit, the thought of contacting you did cross my mind, but I could never do it. I guess that I knew what would happen if we were to ever talk again and while it was mildly appealing, we had already had our shot and we didn’t make it. Maybe our timing was off, maybe in the end we just wanted and needed different things.

I used to want to do all those cheesy things together; to grow together, to grow old together, share everything with you. My future was always up in the air, I could never make up my mind with what I wanted to do, but I knew that I wanted you to be there with me, no matter what I decided. Even though I never wanted to be without you, somewhere in our relationship I realized that it wouldn’t work out between us, at least not with who we both were at the time. I’m not trying to say that there was anything wrong with us but we were always at two different places and no matter how hard you want to be with someone, it won’t work if you’re traveling at opposite directions.

Since we’ve been trying to “be friends” I’ve come to a few conclusions. I like having you in my life, I would do anything for you if you ever needed it or asked for something, I still love you, but as much as I thought about getting back together with you before, I now know that it would never work. If I’m going to be honest, with myself and with you, I don’t want to get back together. There are a lot of reasons for that but it’s not important.

The whole point of this is that I love you but I just don’t see myself with you anymore. And that’s a huge step for me because I like to hold onto things even when there’s nothing to hold onto.

– Josh

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Thousands of bloggers have already begun posting up their articles for Blog Action Day. Some, undoubtedly, will talk about global poverty. Some will talk about poverty at home. Some will talk about their personal experiences. No matter how you blog, what you write about, the fact that people are talking about it is what counts.

In Olean, population 15k (or around there), we have homeless people. We have extremely harsh and cold winters, our Spring and Fall seasons are wet and cold. There are only two or three homeless people here, but they stand out like a sore thumb. They walk around town, pushing shopping carts filled with all of their belongings. They gather up receipts so they can use the Burger King coupons on the back. It’s not often they have enough money to go to Burger King and use these coupons, but when they do, they save their extra whoppers for when they are hungry again.

Not too long ago, a dead body was found out by our Wal Mart. It’s not often that we find dead bodies in Olean and certainly not out in public. Most people suspected murder or suicide, never expecting that what really happened was that a homeless man, who had been living in the area, had died.

No matter where I am, I always try to give the homeless my change or some money, I try to buy them some food, or give them some sort of clothing to help keep them warm. Homelessness is a problem, even in my small town.

I once knew a homeless woman who lived here. She had lost her job due to outsourcing, couldn’t afford her bills any longer, she tried to find other work but in Olean’s ailing economy, it wasn’t possible. She lost her house, she lost her car, and working at one of the minimum wage jobs here barely kept her in an apartment. She no longer had health insurance and her medical bills kept racking up.

Before she knew it, she was homeless. She keeps her belongings, some clothes, a coat, and extra pair of shoes, and a blanket, stuffed in a shopping cart covered with a garbage bag. She collects the Burger King coupons and when you asked her if she wanted money she would always say that she needed to work for her money. I was feeling generous one cold, winter night when I bought her a night in a hotel room. I don’t know why she accepted, maybe it was the thought of a shower or being warm for the night, but she did. I haven’t seen her since.

This woman, she was just like my mom, like me, like a lot of people I know. She just got stuck. It’s hard to break out from the bottom when opportunities are limited, especially when you don’t have a place to call home.

The fact is, a lot of people in my town are on the verge of being like this. Rents and mortgages can’t be paid on time, bills are past due, there isn’t enough for food, new clothes, even when needed, just won’t ever be bought. Times are tight everywhere, but on top of the already rising prices, we have to compete with NY State taxes. Because of taxes, a gallon of gas is still $3.50something in NY, while in Pennsylvania, where I work, it’s fallen to below the $3 mark. It’s hard to keep afloat when you have to choose between gas to get to work or food.

Global poverty is a huge problem. We could solve that if we all really wanted to, but the wealth of the world won’t change hands anytime soon. Local poverty, people try to ignore, but eventually you’ll see it. If you’re in Olean, just drive down Green St. You’ll see it.

Brian over at CopyBlogger has a great thing going: for every pledge of a $10 donation to Save The Children, Brian will donate $25. I’ve already donated my $10 and I’m currently looking at Kiva.org to continue helping out. Larissa Meek has a nice write-up of Kiva.org and what she did in the fight against poverty.

Take a moment to donate; really it doesn’t take much to make a difference.

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