For those of you that don’t follow along with me (sorry about the severe lack of updates, by the way), I’m a member and have a blog over at tumblr. I use this mainly for silly things, posting music, and very rarely do I post anything serious or of any consequence there. Honestly, I haven’t really been in the mood to update this blog just for the fact that I haven’t really cared about anything serious lately, or couldn’t really bring myself to speak out about something that I cared about enough to warrant a blog post. But I think that has changed and I’m in a place where I can start doing that again. Anyway, back to why I tumblr.
I follow a bunch of people on tumblr and at some point this morning, a link was brought to my attention. Men can be feminists too and men can care about rape and they can do things and speak against the Rape Culture. Yes, for those of you wondering, there is in fact a Rape Culture. I don’t think I need to go much further then this article to prove that to anyone. I went on a rant after reading the first linked article from Daily Kos and it sort of spawned an awesome discussion both on tumblr and on my Facebook, where I decided to copy and paste my rant. I thought that I would do the same here in order to spawn some discussion and debate and let’s see where we end up with all of this.
Spot fucking on.
Let me tell you something. I have three younger sisters and one of them has already been a victim. The two youngest have a pretty high chance of being raped also and I’m very protective of them only because of this. My sister was raped when she was 17, more than 80% of my friends that are girls have been raped, and I watched, stood by really, as it destroyed them. In a few instances, I count myself as responsible because there were signs, things were said, and I stood by and did nothing. I learned my lesson quickly and now I don’t put up with shit. My friends say something that degrades, puts down women, I stomp on it. I overhear someone saying “no means yes,” I punch them in the face. I hear someone talking about taking a drunk girl home, I can be the ultimate cock block.
There is a very skewed and fucked up mentality going on in our culture. I can blame the media and I can blame celebrities that dress and act like dumbasses, but what it comes down to is that we’re all easily manipulated into thinking that there isn’t a problem. But there is a HUGE FUCKING PROBLEM. We, as males, need to realize this and start doing something about it because I’m really tired of being woken up after closing time and running over to a [girl]friend’s house because she’s too scared to call the police or go to the hospital alone, or because she doesn’t want to be alone, or because she needs someone to be with her. The idea that women are sexual objects put on this Earth to shove our dicks in is fucking ridiculous. You want to get off? Masturbate, buy a Fleshlight. There is no fucking reason for rape, for sexual assualt, for violence. Period. There is no fucking reason for it.
You think this doesn’t affect you? Wrong. Your sister, your mom, your aunt, your cousins, your friends. These are the people that could possibly suffer. Would you be okay with the fact that your mom was raped? No, you wouldn’t be. Do something to prevent it instead of just standing by, reading articles, trying to defend the male psyche. Get over it and stand up. I’m pretty sure you don’t like knowing that most women view every man as a potential rapist, including you, and there is only one way to change that.
This is certainly not my best argument or rant but it is definitely heartfelt and passionate and something that I feel very deeply about. I think it is important to also point out one of the comments left on my Facebook by my friend Amanda, who is spot on:
Just thinking about this makes me sick. People joke, but I can’t imagine living a life where I wasn’t constantly looking over my shoulder. Also, there is a misconception about conventionally “hot” girls being more susceptible to this treatment. Untrue. Misogynists will find those things each woman is insecure about and capitalize on it (i.e., being… Read More a “whore,” a bitch, a prude, a fatty, a crazy cat lady), no matter what they look like or what their personal values and perceptions are.
And let’s get one thing straight – no one ever “asks for it.” No means No, not maybe, or possibly, or “you can try to change my mind.” It means no, regardless of length of skirt or rise of shirt. However, when a woman gets raped, there is inevitably the person who will ask what she was wearing or what she was doing walking home alone at night.
Why shouldn’t she be able to wear whatever the fuck she wants or walk wherever the fuck she wants at whatever time she wants? We’re people too, equally as capable, smart and responsible as those of you with something swinging between your legs. But this Rape Culture we live in tells us we should be afraid, and given society’s acceptance of playing the blame game, maybe we should.
Please discuss, I’m really curious as to your thoughts on this; not just my comments or Amanda’s but about Rape Culture in general.
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