Josh Anastasia

One of the weirdest situations I’ve been in since I came to Cleveland was meeting Ness’ ex-girlfriend. We went out for drinks with some friends and that’s how I was introduced to her ex. Since then, her ex has spent the night twice because it was more convenient for her to stay here than back at her place. I didn’t mind, and at first, it made me kind of nervous, but now that I’ve spent some time with her, the only time I think of her as Ness’ ex is when she can relate exactly to a situation between Ness and I. For example, when Ness gets drunk.

I think I’ve mentioned previously that Ness is in a wedding in October. She and her ex. They had to go down towards Columbus to get fitted for their dresses on Thursday, I went along because I didn’t feel like staying home by myself all day. That and the bride wanted to meet me because she’s heard a lot about me. Good things I hope, but you can never be too sure.

It was decided that Ness would drive. We were listening to the new Hanson CD, and yes, I’ll admit that I like their new album, when Ness started cursing about traffic. I didn’t really think anything of it because that’s what Ness does. But as I looked ahead, trying to see what the hold up was, I saw that it was an accident. I didn’t really know how bad it was until we drove right past the scene. Three cars, one of them an SUV, another one flipped upside down. We realized that there had been some little kids in the cars. They seemed okay though, as did a couple of the drivers. I’m not sure about whoever was driving the car that flipped upside down though.

We finally made it to 271 South after Ness and I got into it about how she drives. It’s not that she’s a bad driver, because ultimately I trust her, but her driving is a result of her environment. Yes, Ohioans, you are insane drivers. Ness drives the way she does because she has to avoid all the idiots around her, but when you drive like that, you become one of the bad drivers. Maybe not as bad, but definitely bad. I noticed that the whole way there, she didn’t tail-gate, and she didn’t really speed. Thank you, Ness.

Just a few exits before Mansfield, we stopped at Grandpa’s Cheese Barn or something like that. Ness and I picked up some chocolate covered pretzels, some other chocolate things, and a happy face chocolate sucker for me. We really just needed to stretch our legs more than anything.

Finally, we arrived at the bridal shop. It’s funny how people in the city of Cleveland are hesitant about whether or not I’m male or female, but once we get outside of Cleveland, dare I say boonies, they don’t even think and assume that I’m female. It doesn’t really bother me any, it’s just something I have to deal with, being trans and all. It’s just something that I’ve noticed.

Ness has a thing about pet stores. Whenever we see one, we have to go in and look at the animals. There was one right by the bridal shop, and guess what, they had puppies. I didn’t bring my allergy medicine. Ness fell in love with a pom-a-poo. She named him Stanley. She wants me to buy him for her birthday. I have to admit, he’s a cute little furry ball of fluff. I might just have to buy it for her. Or buy her one. I’m not sure if he’d still be there come November. We played with the puppy, checked out the cats, I made sure to pet the chinchilla, and we even touched a star fish, that is, after I assured Ness that it wouldn’t bite her.

We rolled out of the pet store, her ex was now driving because we had to make a stop at their friend’s house and Ness wasn’t sure of the way. My eyes started to itch and get watery. Her ex had some Zyrtec. I wasn’t sure if I was allergic to the allergy medicine or not, but I figured I’d rather have an allergic reaction to medicine than to animals. I took it. It was a mistake.

By the time we got to their friend’s house, I had a really bad heart burn and my back started to hurt. Symptoms of me having an allergy attack from medicine. I ignored it because it wasn’t that bad yet. Come to find out that her friend had a Wii. Ness and I bowled and played some tennis. I did fairly well at bowling, but I pretty much kicked her ass at tennis. I want a Wii now, because that was a really good work out.

After I met her friend and her friend’s husband to be, we had to head back to Cleveland. I sat in the backseat trying not to let on how much pain I was in. By that time, my whole body hurt, plus I had the heartburn still. Those chocolate covered pretzels had melted in the car, but Ness was still eating some and offered them to me. I took the bag, stuck my fingers in, and commented how it felt like I was digging around inside an asshole. I have a weird sense of humor, so just go along with it.

By the time we arrived back home, I could barely walk, but I managed to go to the bathroom and get into bed. I hadn’t taken off any of my clothes however. I was laying in bed trying to get comfortable. It didn’t happen. Ness took care of me the rest of the night. She was worried so she stayed awake till about 4AM, just to make sure I was okay if I woke up.

At any rate, that was my Thursday. Well, actually, there’s a lot more to the past week, but I can’t talk about it. If I did, I’d have to kill you. And just in case you’ve forgotten, I do have mafia connections; I could make it happen.